We could have sworn you said the ark wasn’t leaving till 5.
Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection.
Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma’s a bitch.
Sincerely, The Titanic
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
I can make your girlfriend scream louder than you can.
I’ve never heard anyone say, “I don’t know, let’s Yahoo! it…” just saying…
Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea… Just kidding! They’re all dead.
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF happened?!
Dear Windshield Wipers,
Can’t touch this.
Sincerely, That Little Triangle
I liked it, so I put a ring on it.
Please tell me how you managed to stop at three Ho’s.
Sincerely, Tiger Woods
Dear Boys Wearing Skinny Jeans,
I. Can’t. Breathe.
Sincerely, Your Balls
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn?
I got it from this Swedish girl in Australia: alifeinoz.blogspot.com